Wednesday, March 01, 2006

Guy Friendships...

I love that my son has a good handful of boys in the neighborhood, close to his age and that he will most likely grow up with them. My daughters had the same thing, for the most part, too.

But the girls' circle of friends changed considerably as they got older. I'm told by men that I know that these boys' friendships have a good chance of lasting a lifetime. That is such a good thing...except...

...there's that one kid - the one that you want to ask, "Hey kid, would you like a little cheese with that whine?", and complains when he doesn't get his way (at a particular dB that hurts my ears) and then says he's going home (but rarely does).

After he actually did live up to his promise to "...take my toys and go home!" I had to ask, "If he complains all the time why do you guys play with him? The other three said, "I don't know, we just do."


Anonymous Anonymous said...

It's just the way guys are. You might as well get used to it.
That there's a whiny, dorky guy in the mix...well, that's not very important. It's not like these kids are debating the fate of the Universe, or the fine points of quantum physics, after all. (Ever!) What counts is the chemistry between the guys involved, and for reasons no one knows, least of all those kids, Mr. Whiny fits in with the plan.
Now in the years to come, there can be problems. Let's say that this fellow asks out one of his pals' girlfriends. That could have a deleterious effect on the group friendship -- accompanied, no doubt with, at the very least, the threat of an ass-kicking.
Truth of the matter, though, is that the boyfriend of the girlfriend would slough it off with a "You couldn't get her to go out with you if you'd just won $350 million in the Power Ball!"
Groups of friends know their places in the group, and they don't usuallu cross it. Why would they? The group functions best when everyone has a clearly defined role. And trust me, even that Whiny, dorky kid plays an important part in the group dynamic.
Let 'em alone. They'll work it all out on their own, and that dorky kid just could be the next generation's Bill Gates...and such folks tend to hire people they know and can trust.

2:13 PM  

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